Journal

Orange Notebook

Not So Half, After All

Immediately after I wrote my last entry, about the half-ideas and all, I kind of settled on a concept. The concept fleshed itself out over the day, and right now, I think I’ve got something to hang on to. It might be temporary. It might not be. Still, it’s all I’ve got for now.

With the ideas working themselves out, I took out a new (Alcatel) notebook. Orange. I started scribbling. As I always do. It’s the way I work. I just started listing down everything. I forget ideas easily. Though the result of such scribbling is usually terribly disorganised, it’s also the only way I can make sure that I don’t miss anything.

Given time, this will all sort itself out. I’ll settle on some things, discard others. I’ll revise. I’ll change. I’ll cheer. I’ll despair. It’s all part of the way it works.

There is an unusual pressure involved with this. Part of this is down to how (after the sense of personal accomplishment with my current project; which I know I was supposed to talk about a week ago or something but failed to) I’m trying to turn this writing consistency into something more reliable. That is, I don’t want to live with the 50-50 (well, actually, more like 30-70, on the side of failures) uncertainty that it’ll live or die. I want to be able to eke out something with some degree of consistency, or at least, know early when the ship is going to sink. This transition makes me nervous.

The other part of it that gets to me is that I realised I was subconsciously invoking what to me is one of the most important works of literature. I don’t want to have something to live up to, but I do see the similarities, and I’ll have to work my way around those somehow.

But at least it’s a start.

No School Today

I have no school today. It’s not that I love going to school or anything, but I must say that it leaves me with a strange sense of emptiness. Very unusual. Test in two days, though. :|

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© 2008 a modest odyssey.